My birthday is fast approaching and I can't believe that I am turning 26. It feels like just yesterday I was preparing for the sweet 16 party themed "Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice." But that was nearly a decade ago. It's scary how quickly time flies. But as I look over my life and reflect on past experiences, I still feel like the same person I was when I was 16. I still worry about the same types of situations, I still have almost all the same friends, I still carry the weight of the same insecurities, I still have trouble expressing how I feel, I still associate with almost all the same guys who have grown up to be all the same men, my favorite color is still fushia, my favorite thing to eat is still fried catfish and jambalaya, I still lose weight when I get stressed out, I still experience anxiety in my stomach, I still have blackouts and daydream so hard that I can't hear anything that's going on around me, I still live in the same house and sleep in the same room....But how can I still be the same person? Haven't I learned from life's experiences? Am I not growing and changing. I've done alot in the past 10 years, so why do I still feel stuck in the same spot? I'm still waiting for that experience that bridges the gap between childhood and adulthood. It feels like the years are flying by and the world around me is moving so quickly. I really just want to move at the same rapid pace. But I understand that patience is a virtue. So I'm patienlty waiting for my life to come together. But it seems like as I continue to make steps in the right direction, the goal of success slips farther away. The goal constanly changes and evolves and the closer I get to it, the more I revise it and add more steps to take to get to it. And as a result, another year has gone by and I still can't believe I'm not 16 anymore.
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